Friday, May 29, 2009

big day

Today is a big day .... 3 years in the making. 

Aaron has been on staff with Northview 3 years this summer - at the time there was a vision for Urban Ministry and the Brookside area where NVCL had been serving with a youth program ...  but not structured or growing. Aaron spent most of the first 6 months traveling to Chicago, Detroit, Philly - Cities where churches had developed urban ministry and were creating a huge impact on communities. He learned most of those initiatives have been working for 20 or more years.  But he was inspired by all he witnessed. Over 3 years, Aaron has read many many books relating to Urban Issues - he thirsts for learning. 

With no doubt, Aaron is a man lead by God. He has been provided a vision and is patient. Tonight is the first opportunity that Aaron will be able to share the vision of Urban Ministry on a big scale. We are so excited. God is so good! I am so blessed that I have had the opportunity to work behind the scene with logistic details - so cool. The Urban Ministry has grown and been blessed with amazing VOLUNTEER leaders in 11 different ministry areas - WOW all in only 3 years.

This is just the start .... what an amazing thing God is doing, not just in the City, but also in the 'Burbs! 

So was I surprised when the word from Joel struck me .... NO WAY! 

At the Appointed Time


"For the vision is yet for an appointed time…it will surely come; it will not be behindhand on its appointed day"
(Habakkuk 2:3, AMP).

TODAY'S WORD from Joel and Victoria

God is looking for people who have a made-up mind; people who will trust His timing. You may not see His promises happen overnight, but they will happen. In the Bible, Abraham waited 20 years to have a son and see his promise come to pass. Moses waited 40 years to fulfill his purpose and lead the children of Israel out of captivity. You might say, “Joel, I’ve been waiting for a year, and I don’t see anything happening.” No, something is happening. Right now, God is working behind the scenes in your life. He is arranging the right people, the right breaks, and the right opportunities.

Today’s scripture tells us that at the appointed time, the promise will come to pass, and it will not be one second late! When is the appointed time? It’s when God knows the timing is best for you. When you understand and accept this principle, it takes all the pressure off. It’s a very freeing way to live knowing that as long as we stay in faith, God will release His favor, His increase, His restoration, and His healing at exactly the right time in our lives!


Father in heaven, thank You for working behind the scenes in my life. I trust that the appointed time for me is on its way. I am content in You, knowing that You have a good plan for my future. I bless you today and always. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.

THE LORD IS GOOD! All the time:) 


Thursday, May 28, 2009

Wheew - Thursday already!

Where has this week gone! Many projects going on, that will be culminating soon.

1: Good Neighbor Night, at Northview Christian Life Church. Friday May 29, the focus will be Urban Ministry. This will be a major turning point in our ministry ... knowing how God is going to capture hearts. There have been a number of people working hard behind the scenes - I am looking forward to the event! FYI: 6:30 - 8:30 pm in the Main Lobby at Northview. All are welcome.
2: Loving Well Women's Retreat, at Brookside Community Church Saturday June 6. The leadership teams are discussing the videos and the decoration team is busy creating. I am so blessed with awesome women who have stepped into roles to assist in this inaugural event. If you want to attend shoot me an email and I will get you more info:
3: KidsGames, at Brookside Community Church June 14 - 18 .... planning the curriculum and partnering with ConnectionPointe Church in Brownsburg. 

All are awesome and while they have each been challenging on different levels eye opening in how the Lord has equipped me to do all the tasks. My years teaching, coaching and working with Student and Class Councils - WOW! 

Yesterday was a fun filled day. I started the day with my Mothers "Strider's" group. This is a group of women that do a bible study then go on walks. Yesterday I helped them make prayer bracelets - it was a great time. Many of the women I have known for some time - my parents still attend the church where I grew up. It was wonderful to listen to their plans for the bracelets ... and create VERY cool art. 
From there, I met with my sister and her 3 little ones and headed to my friends house for a Discovery Toy party ... all the kiddos were 3 and under - my friend created the perfect kid friendly foods - they all had a great time. It was nice to hang out with the moms - and the toys kept them all VERY entertained. 
The day finished with the retreat leadership team viewing the first 2 lessons from Beth Moore - she is GOOD. It was an excellent way to cap off the day. 

My reading from yesterday ... (I just started Jeremiah, last year I was in this book when Aaron and I had our first ultra sound, receiving Jeremy's prognosis ... different eyes reading this time)

This is what the Lord says: stand at the crossroads and look; as for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls. Jeremiah 6:16
prayer: Lord, show me the path you have for me so that I may walk in it and find rest for my soul.

Lord,  thank you that you direct me on your path. Create in me a heart that is willing to be filled with your love and desire. Thank you that when I grow weary you lift me up and I am never alone. Thank you that you have sent your Holy Spirit to be with me always. Thank you that you go before and come behind me with a hedge of protection that is greater then anything I might face. My strength is all from you - you are my anchor Lord. Continue to pour into me Lord, so that I can pour into others.  In your Son's Holy and precious name Jesus. AMEN.


Saturday, May 23, 2009

The Tradition Continues

Since 1993, I have gone to Union Chapel Cemetery (one of the oldest in Indy) with my Dad (and his American Legion Post) to put flags on all the Veterans Graves. Some of the stones are back to the Civil War. This year was one of the nicest days in our 16 year history. Some years it has been cold, rainy and down right yucky. Today, perfect.

That first year, I was just home my from my freshmen year in college and said okay when my dad asked me to go with him. I had no idea at the time how so many years later it would become something we all expect to do. Section F (the part we are responsible for) was difficult to maneuver and determine where all the veterans were resting in the early years. But now, after so many years, it is like visiting old friends. 
The first year it was just me and my dad ... since then our group has grown, both my sisters and their families. It is really cool. 
Jack, my sisters oldest is 10, opted not to sleep over with a friend Friday because we were doing the flags Saturday. What an awesome tradition - and not to mention an excellent way to remember what we are celebrating on Memorial Day. 

Enjoy the day ... and the weekend.

Friday, May 22, 2009


In the journal I am writing, there are scriptures along the bottom. Even with reading the Bible daily and God Calling ... it is amazing that the encouragement needed has been pre-printed on the page that I turned to write today .....
 For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. Ephesians 2:10

My Prayer today:
Lord, thank you that you are my Father. That you have loved me and guided me as your child.
For, I am God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for me to do. Thank you Lord for passing your peace to me. Help me to pass the same peace to others. In your son's precious name, Jesus. AMEN.


Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Of Course ...

An excerpt from an email from My Special Nurse:
Thought of you a lot over the weekend and wanted to say hello…this is a really profound time frame within the first year, the 3-4 month mark up to about 6 months is brutal, that’s what other families would want me to say.  If you feel like it’s all unraveling and you’re not doing “as well” as you once were, that’s to be expected

This morning I was writing for a very long time in my Journal. Aaron was waiting on me, He said "lots to write today". I shared with him the note from our Special Nurse - for the past 2 weeks I have been in a funk. But not until this note was I able to figure out that it is part of my grieving process - so yes, I had a lot to write about. Aaron also said that for the past few weeks he has been thinking about Jeremy often and found himself agitated and short. But neither one of us brought it up ... For me I do not bring Jeremy up often because I do not want to burden others or make Aaron (or anyone listening) think he is ALL I ever think and talk about. So I have been guarding my tongue and trying to suppress feelings that I thought I was over.
I am having a hard time realizing that I am still on this journey, the race will not be over until I enter into His glorious presence. What a day that will be ... I am so thankful for Aaron and all the prayer warriors. 
I am thankful that we can choose how we trek on this journey ... I long to hear "Well done, good and faithful servant"

From Joel today:

Choose to Rejoice


"Rejoice in the Lord, you [consistently] righteous (upright and in right standing with God), and give thanks at the remembrance of His holiness"
(Psalm 97:12, AMP).

TODAY'S WORD from Joel and Victoria

All through the scripture we are told to rejoice in the Lord always. It’s interesting that the word “rejoice” doesn’t just mean to be vocal and to give God praise with our words. Rejoice also means “to brighten up,” “to spin around,” and “to leap for joy.” In other words, you rejoice with your actions. You rejoice with your countenance. Do you realize you can rejoice by simply putting a smile on your face?When times are tough, when things aren’t going as planned, many people have a long, sour face. They’re down, discouraged, worried, and upset. But when you choose to rejoice, you smile and have a pleasant demeanor no matter what. And it’s not because you necessarily feel like it or because everything is perfect. You just simply smile by faith. You smile knowing that your expression is saying to God, “I trust You. I know you are working all things out for my good.”
Make the decision today and every day to rejoice in the Lord! Put a smile on your face and let the whole world know your hope is in the Lord.


Father God, I choose to rejoice in You. I know that Your goodness goes way beyond my difficulty. I know that even when I don’t see a way, You are making a way for me. Fill me with Your supernatural peace and joy as I surrender every area of my life to You. In Jesus’ Name. Amen.


Monday, May 18, 2009


Knowing Which Way to Go
"Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you saying, 'This is the way; walk in it' " Isaiah 30:21
... All to often we don't hear that voice behind us. We hear the voices clamoring around us instead; we hear our own internal concerns and issues; we're in a hurry, and so we just forge ahead on the path ans hope that everything will work out in the end.
When Isaiah gave this promise of God's guidance, it was in the midst of a description of people turning their hearts back to God. He has just prophesied to them about God's compassion in waiting for them to get their priorities in line. When they established right priorities, when their hearts were drawn in the right direction, God's voice would guide them.
As you seek guidance, listen for God's voice. It will be there. Take a few quiet moments to wait on HIM and give HIM time to respond.

The past three weeks have continued to OPEN my eyes. While stepping down from coaching was  a big step for me - there has been a peace surrounding me like none before, the Lord has been opening my eyes and many doors around me. TOO COOL! 

Looking forward to sharing details soon ... enjoy the beautiful weather Aaron and I will spend this Monday in our yard ... 

Thursday, May 14, 2009


My reading today ... 
Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, "Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?" And I said, "Here am I. Send me."  Isaiah 6:8

I daily ask to be obedient to how the Lord desires to use me. I pray for continued obedience, a faithful trust that HE indeed has a good and perfect plan -  my part is to be willing and move out when told. This continues to be a struggle for me. I am remain compartmentalized. Some areas that I have given complete and total control to God, then others I am holding on quite tight - but my grip is loosening. 

my prayer:
Lord, I will GO, I will DO - I am prepared and equipped by you to do the good works you have prepared for me in advance. With your loving hand you have moved me, placed me in a new position. You have created in me a new heart - a new will and a new desire. Lord light me on FIRE for YOU. Thank you Lord for your clarity and the opening of my ears and heart to recognize Your hand in my life. Continue to loosen my grip on areas that you desire to control. Thank you for your patience with me - thank you for your continued pursuit of me fully as your child. 
 In your son's precious name, Jesus. AMEN.


Monday, May 11, 2009

Timing is Everything

Such a great read this morning, from Stormie
He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end. Ecclesiastes 3:11

When it comes to prayer, most of is things about timing - that is, we think about what the timing of God's answers should be. When the answer doesn't come immediately, we anxiously wonder why. But Ecclesiastes tells us,"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven." God's timing is not the same as ours. His ways are not our ways. WE live out lives with a sense of earthly time. God sees things from an eternal perspective. Living in our time-bound world waiting for God's timing is often hard, especially when we ask for things we want or need now.
We have to remember that even though we pray and have faith, the final outcome and timing are in God's hands. He says there is "a time to heal" (3:3). So if you pray for healing and nothing happens, don't beat yourself up or be mad at God. God sometimes uses physical ailments to get our attention so HE can speak to us, He wants us to fervently turn to HIM. So keep praying ans don't give up hope. 
The same is true when praying that God will save some one's life. We don't have the final say over any one's hour if death. The bible says there is "a time to die" (3:2), but we are not the ones who decide that. God does. And we must accept His decision. We can pray, but HE determines the outcome. We have to allow HIM to do that without resenting our getting angry at Him.
God's timing is perfect. And it is liberating when we surrender to it. There is great freedom in simply laying our concerns and desires before Him and then trusting Him for the outcome. What joy there is in looking for God's goodness to us in the midst of our times of waiting. While you may not be able to understand exactly what God is doing, you can trust that He is doing something. He has your best interests at heart. And He will make everything in your life beautiful in HIS perfect time.

This weekend I found myself in a funk - working outside in the yard is helping. I am ordering mulch this week and will be transplanting / splitting many of my plants. Along with planning the memory garden and patio area. Right now, I can tell I am in a time of being alone. Spending time with myself - just for a little while longer. Thank you all for continued prayers and notes of encouragement. It is a true blessing to know that I am NEVER alone with the body of Christ so close.


Farewell Dear Friend

Yesterday I said a heartfelt good bye to my dear friend and cat of 12 years. Over the last few months Murphy was getting smaller and less active. He re surged when I changed food 3 months ago. But over the last 2 weeks Aaron and I noticed a major change. He was having trouble getting on the bed, in favorite chairs  and would rest in very random places. Yesterday, he got up to eat in the morning, then went under our bed. When we returned from church, I was able to give him some love (gentle petting), then checked on him through the day - he would turn his head to me, and his brother Foster sat with him too. 
My family was over for Mothers Day Cupcakes (Kate and I made them) we checked on him again - still breathing. After everyone had left about 9 pm we checked on him again. I knew, he was no longer with us. Comforted to know, he was in a house full of love. 
I found Murphy 12 years ago at the Humane Society. He moved in with me to my first apartment and all other places I have lived since that first apartment  ... he was a great cat. Always on the small side, but loved to sit next to you and get loves. 

Below, Murphy is the "big" one of the two in my first apartment. Foster was a new kitten - who is now a BIG cat. We will all miss Murphy, even Aaron  - but rest knowing he had a great life.


Saturday, May 9, 2009


Sunday, tomorrow, is Mothers Day and to be quite honest this "hallmark holiday" hurts my stomach. Daily I am bombarded with thoughts of Jeremy, they just seem to have quadrupled this morning. I am pretty sure this is normal and I need to acknowledge the feelings. But I do not lose my trust in the plan that God has for me ... 

From God Calling:
Harmony Within
Follow my guidance. Be afraid to venture on your own as a child fears to leave its mother's side. Doubt of your own wisdom, and reliance on Mine, will teach you humility. Humility is not the belittling of the self. It is forgetting the self. Nay more, forgetting the self because you are remembering ME. You must not expect to live in a world where all us harmony. You must not expect to live where others are in broken accord with you. It is your task to maintain your own heart peace in adverse circumstances. Harmony is always yours when you strain your ear to catch Heaven's music. Doubt always your power or wisdom to put things right; ask ME to right all as you leave it to Me, and go on your way loving and laughing. I am WISDOM. Only My Wisdom can rightly decide anything - settle any problem. So rely on ME. All is well.

What an awesome reminder that as we humble ourselves - to walk in obedience to HIS will ... asking for wisdom and guidance - all is well. My heart continues to ache, but I rest in knowing I do not ache alone. For the Lord is close to the brokenhearted. Who better knows and understands the loss of a son. 

from Stormie Omartian:
Walking in obedience has not to do only with keeping God's commandments but also with heeding God's specific instructions. ...Whatever he asks you to do, remember He does this for your greater good. God's ways are always better then ours, and obedience to His word clears the path for our prayers to be heard.

my prayer:  Lord, I pray, help me move beyond myself. I am dreading mothers day and the emotions that surround me. Help me Lord to feel your presence always, to know that you have a good an perfect plan - you are in control. Remove from me, anything that does not bring glory to YOU. Fill me with wisdom to walk in obedience with you. Because of You Lord, I can walk in obedience, trusting You along the way - always. You alone, provide the strength needed, the endurance beyond measure. Lord, I thank you that before I think it or ask it - you know my every need. You are my strong hold, my foundation. Praise to you Father, in Jesus Name - AMEN.


Thursday, May 7, 2009

Shine On

I was cleaning and organizing the volleyball office for the next coach and this was on my wall. Worth sharing, even if you have read it before ....

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is the we are POWERFUL beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves who am I to be Brilliant, Gorgeous, Talented and Fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of GOD.
Your playing small does not serve the world.
There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We were born to make manifest the glory of GOD that is with in us.
It's not just in some of us, it is in EVERYONE.
And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. 
As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.
- Marianne Williamson


Wednesday, May 6, 2009

My my ...

Sublime Audacity .... from God Calling
The way is long and weary. It is a weary world. So many today are weary. "Come unto Me ... and I will give you rest." My children, who range yourselves under My flag, you must see that on it are inscribed those words "The Son of Man." Whatever the world is feeling, I must feel, I - the Son of Man. You are My followers - so the weariness of man today must be shared by you - the weary and heavy-laden must come you, and find that rest that you found in ME. 
My children, My followers must be prepared not to sit on my right hands and on My left, but to drink of the cup that I drink of. 
Poor world - teach it that there is only one cure for all its ills - UNION with ME, DARE to suffer, DARE to conquer; be filled with My sublime audacity. Remember that. Claim the unclaimable.
Just what the world would think impossible can always be yours. Remember, My children, SUBLIME AUDACITY.

After reading, I pulled out my dictionary to be certain that I understood sublime and audacity.
SUBLIME: exalted, noble, awe inspiring beauty ... glorious
AUDACITY: daring, bold

MY MY MY ... how I thank the Lord that HE is bold, awe inspiring and glorious ... 2 words that begin to capture God. In a manner my feeble mind can start to understand. The depths of my soul rejoice, I pray that God will continue the good work HE has begun in me. 
I am so thankful that I can understand FINALLY, taking my first steps of obedience that I feel the boldness of the Lord swelling in me. With HIS boldness - I also feel that I have entered a restful peace - casting worries, cares, stresses to Jesus - Trusting that yes, HE will carry me. LORD use me for your will, allow your peace and rest that I have found in you to pour into those that are searching for the same peace. 
LORD, I am anchored in you!


Tuesday, May 5, 2009

had to share this one ...

just read joel, and had to share this one,

Living Hope
“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In His great mercy He has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead” (I Peter 1:3, NIV).
TODAY'S WORD from Joel and Victoria
In what or in whom do you put your hope? Sometimes it’s easy to get focused on the natural realm and put our hope in what we can see or what we can understand—people, jobs, governments. But we have to remember, this world is temporary. When we put our hope in things of this world, eventually those things will fade away. But when we put our hope in Jesus, we are hoping in what is real and eternal. Through Him, we have a living hope—hope that will never disappoint or fade away.
I like how Webster’s dictionary defines hope: “to desire with expectation of obtainment.” Isn’t it good to know that we will obtain every promise given to us through Christ Jesus? We have a future and a hope!The next time you feel discouraged or frustrated with what’s going on around you, remember that you have hope inside of you that is alive. You have the promise that He will never leave you nor forsake you. Put your hope in God and let Him direct you in the good plan He has for you!
Father in heaven, thank You for a living hope! I choose right now to refocus my mind and heart on Your purposes for me. Help me stay focused on what is eternal so that I can make wise decisions in everything I do. I bless You today and always. In Jesus’ Name. Amen


Let ME Choose

from God Calling:
My loved ones. Yes, with the heart, not the head, men should think of ME, and then worship would be instinctive. Breathe in MY very Spirit in pure air and fervent desire. Keep the eye of your spirit ever upon ME, the window of your soul open towards ME. You have ever to know that all things are yours - that what is lovely I delight to give you. Empty your mind of all that limits. Whatever is beautiful you can have. Leave more and more the choice to ME. You will have no regrets.
Being submitted to GOD - what a joy. The word submit, for the past 3 years has seemed like an unmentionable word. Our life group early on, did a study about the marriage relationship and wives are to be submitted to their husbands - that rubbed me so wrong. I was Miss Independent! The Bible MUST be wrong on that topic, there was no way I would ever be weak and submitted ... but our worldview of submission is not the biblical view - As Aaron has grown in his role and submitted to the will of God in developing Urban Ministry I have witnessed him remain strong and at the same time a humbleness to follow what God has planned. What an amazing example, and obvious for me to come in alignment with Aaron, who is in alignment with God - it feels SO right:) Once again, the Bible is correct.

Also just recently, my "forever" best friend... we have known each other since we were 2 ... and still to this day even living in different states can pick up as if we live next door to each other still - anyway, she for many years has been searching for "MR RIGHT" - and she has been lead to a man that is all she dreamed of. My immediate comment - "She got out of the way of herself and let her guard down" - as I said that I was not just talking about her, I was making a statement about myself. Being submitted, I have stepped out of the way of myself. God is in control, Jesus has taken the wheel!

You open your hand and satisfy the desires of every living thing. The Lord is righteous in all his ways and loving toward all he has made. The Lord is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth. He fulfills the desires of those who fear him; he hears their cry and saves them. Psalm 145:16-19
Lord, I pray that the desires of my heart will be aligned with Your will for my life. Help me to trust Your perfect timing - in all things. I surrender ALL my dreams to you.

Why this prayer ...
Yesterday was Jeremy's 4 month birthday - interestingly, I feel extremely peaceful and in a state of rest - PRAISE GOD. I have been able to think about, and be joyful about the time I enjoyed with Jeremy, and how that time has birthed in me something new.
A new me, that feels like the real me.
How this little man moved me - I am certain we are only seeing the start of something big. And I submit all to HIM - He will choose!