12/29/09

December 29th ... closing in on the end of 2009 - the start of 2010. I am working on resolutions - or goals for 2010. I am not even sure where to begin.

Part of me is thinking why make goals if ultimately I am not even in control, why not just go with whatever is thrown my way and let it be.

The other part reminds me that I must be intentional, with my time, focus and actions.

today my God Calling devotion helped set me on the right path:

Work and Prayer

Work and prayer represent the two forces that will ensure success. Your work and My Work. For prayer, believing prayer, is based on the certainly that I am working for you and with you and in you. Go forward gladly and unafraid. I am with you. With men your task may be impossible, but with God all things are possible.

Lord, I ask that you set me on the path that you desire for me. I pray for wisdom, knowledge and understanding of your will for me. Open my eyes to recognize all you desire for me in 2010 and beyond. Thank you Father that you are with me - always. Thank your for the work that you do in me and the work you provide for me to accomplish. Lord you are so good - thank you that with you all things are possible! AMEN.

GRACE AND PEACE!

Ahhh Christmas!

I love celebrating Christmas, the birth of Jesus.

What I am not exactly fond of is the "other" stuff that comes along with it.

Great example ... yesterday at church,

one of our congregants said"Hey First Lady(that is what they affectionally call me), was Santa good to you this year?"

my reply, "Santa, we celebrated the birth of Jesus!"

He smiled and said, "That's what I am talking about - Jesus "

Aaron and I enjoyed full days of Family ... we are so blessed that both of our families are in the Indianapolis area ... our parents still live in the homes we grew up in - about 15/20 min from each other. Both of our Moms have large Christmas Eve spreads ... Aaron and I ate very well.

The 24th began with me picking up my forever friend, in town from Minneapolis for the holiday - and getting some breakfast. I was on a tight schedule, Aaron and I needed to be at Church for the noon service! We had a great visit ...

Aaron and I attened the noon service, I am still in shock that Northview had a LIVE nativity in the foyer ...

This was amazing, the boxes ... presents from Northview families for Jesus. Check out www.nvcl.org to learn more about the Christmas series.

After the service, we headed to the Shelby's ... we had a great time with Aaron's family - and was the food good ... mmmmm!

The Jeremy Bear made his second appearance and we got a shot of the Shelby Cousins,

Bryson (6) and Breaden (21mo) Shelby, Darrin (13) and Dean (6mo)Kirkland

With Shelby Grand parents ... Nana and GrandDaddy ....

We then headed over to my parents .... Jameson (15mo) found the JerBear and gave him a big hug ... how does he know! :) Jack helped keep an eye on him.

the Diehl Cousins ... this was a challenge, to get everyone still and stop touching each other ...

in Front Jack,holding the bear (10), On the couch: Hannah(3.5), Jameson (15mo) Lucy (3.5) Sam (9), in the back: Kate (5) and Will (7).

I truly appreciate both families taking a special picture for me with the bear ...

On Christmas day, Aaron and I woke up just in time to head over to my sisters to enjoy breakfast .... she makes a wonderful egg casserole and coffee cake - so good! They were headed out of town - but not with out Will telling Aaron and I not to even think about coming over and playing Wii while they were gone ... hum to bad they are home already ... :)

After breakfast Aaron and I returned home to get ready to head down to his Aunts ... to eat again. This is the time of the year that all the relatives come out. After 4 years, I am starting to get all the names down. Aaron's mom has 4 sisters ... all with kids - that now have kids - it is a full house.

His Aunt lives around the corner from my parents ... so around 4 we headed over there. My mom had the Turkey in ... with all the fixins - was I hungry .... I ate.

Aaron and I had such a blessed Christmas - time to be together with our families ... it is our prayer that 2010 we will have a baby to add to the family celebrations! Aaron and I are in agreement that this could have been our final Christmas with just the two of us.

PRAISE THE LORD!

Next on the docket ... planning a Birthday Celebration for Jeremy ...

GRACE AND PEACE!

Glowing Memories

Last night Aaron and I attended the Glowing Memories service at Northview. This is an annual service to remember and honor friends and family that have passed. The evening was very special, there was special music, a short message, an opportunity to write the names of those being honored and remembered to place on a wreath, and rows and rows of votives to be lit by each person attending in honor of their loved one.

For me, it was a visual reminder that I am not the only one that has experienced loss. AS the candles were lit, Aaron leaned over and said "it is hard to imagine that each person is here for a different reason." Each person in attendance has a story, and their story includes loss. There was a feeling of community in the sanctuary - a very special type.

I lit 4 candles to honor and remember: Jeremy, Grandma and Grandpa Diehl and Carol Hittle( my sisters mother in law).

It was an amazing site when I returned to my seat and saw all the candles glowing and flickering together. There was a feeling of knowing, recognizing, validating each others loss.

Members of our life group also attended to honor Jeremy - completely overwhelming, and again a visual reminder that i do not own my loss, it is shared. It is a shared loss with this close group of friends, our family and others.

Which also reminds me that when I feel alone and isolated - I am NOT!

Heavenly Father, I thank you for community! Thank you for creating us to desire companionship. Thank you Lord, for reminding us to remember and honor your righteous children.

...a righteous man will be remembered forever Psalm 112:6b

GRACE AND PEACE!

Have your way then ....

from God Calling:

Children, take every moment as of My Planning and ordering. Remember your Master is the Lord of the day's little happenings. In all the small things yield to My gentle pressure on your arm. Stay or go, as that pressure, Love's pressure, indicates.

The Lord of the moments. Creator of the snowdrop and the mighty oak. More tender with the snowdrop than the oak.

And when things do not fall out according to your plan, then smile at ME indulgently, a smile of Love, and say, as you would to a human loved one, "Have Your Way then" - knowing that My loving response will be to make that way as easy for your feet as it can be.

Wonderful .... love it.

GRACE AND PEACE!

2009 Christmas Card

I tried to post this yesterday ... anyway.

Aaron and I in the Ancient city of Ephesus, Turkey October 25th

Jeremiah Parker Shelby January 4th, 2009

GRACE AND PEACE!

2009 in Retrospect

We sent out Christmas pictures this year, and I had every intention of writing a note to go along with the picture ... but there was just too much for one note.

I did create a timeline of the year, before I decided that it was too much for one letter ... here is a glimpse of our 2009 Retrospective:

January:

Jeremy arrived on his due date, 1.4.09

Brookside Community Church 21 days of prayer and fasting, Aaron took some time off and new leaders stepped up. I took time off from school.

February:

Brookside Community Church continues to grow, begin meeting with ministry coordinators ... 11 different areas are identified.

March:

Begin planning for KidsGames. Spring Break, with the "diehl" family. North Captiva, Florida.

April:

Resign from Coaching, I take on new roles in Brookside Community Church: organizing first ever women's retreat.

May:

Continued organization of Leadership at Brookside Community Church. First ever Women's All-Day retreat, Beth Moore Loving Well.

June:

Resign teaching position at North Central. KidsGames .... nephew Dean Alexander Kirkland arrives!

July:

Forever Friend Suzi visits Indy :)

August:

Brookside Community Church, Back Pack Attack. vacation: Wawasee.

September:

Aaron accepts position as Co-Chair for the Legacy Project for the 2012 SuperBowl. Church wide spiritual growth campaign RESET

October:

my birthday month. Mediterranean Cruise - 7 days sailing the seas and seeing the sites!

November:

aarons birthday month. I take on the the "interim" Youth Ministry Coordinator roll. Enjoy an eventful Thanksgiving in the Hittle Home

December:

???? we are still here - this one has to wait.

What a year, talk about how no eye has seen nor ear heard what God has planned .... The Lord was so good to Aaron and I. We are truly blessed!

GRACE AND PEACE!

Picture with Santa

Every year Nana (my mother) has all her grandkids go to Keystone at the Crossing to get a picture with Santa. Her oldest grandkid will be 11 in February ... She has all the pictures displayed in her house, it is fun to see how the group has grown from 1 to 7 ... well 8 when you include the "JerBear". (Ages range 10 years to 15 months)

The little black bear is in the picture to represent Jeremy. The bear is special because in his left arm there is a recording of Jeremy's heartbeat. It was a special shower gift from a dear life group couple ... and now we will continue to have JerBear in all our important family pictures. In this picture, Lucy (one of the twins) is holding on to JerBear for extreme comfort, I am not surprised he comforts me too!

GRACE AND PEACE!

Tomorrow will be my 4th and final Beads By Beth open house (it will be at my home, email me for directions : bethshelby@gmail.com) to have orders completed by Christmas ... the first 3 have blown me away!

I have been so blessed by gracious hosts, wonderful guests and many new customers. This is about to take off .... and I am so excited to be creating, again. The parties have been set up with a display and sampling of my work. Then I talk with each guest (if they are interested) and we design their piece. I love talking through the creative process. So many ideas that can not all come just from my head. That is the aspect of teaching that I do miss - working through problems. Creating solutions that had not been imagined before.

I am looking forward to continued momentum for 2010 - I have dear friends that have ideas that will help me expand ... and they not only have ideas - they offered to help:)

so i loved the devotion from joel ....

Exceedingly Abundantly TODAY'S SCRIPTURE "Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, to Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever" (Ephesians 3:20-21, NKJ) TODAY'S WORD from Joel and Victoria God wants to do exceedingly abundantly above all you can ever ask, think, or imagine. In another place, it says that no person has ever seen, heard, or even imagined the wonderful things that God has in store for those who love the Lord. But notice that it's according to the power working in us. God's power works in us by our faith or how we believe. Do you believe today that God wants to work in your life exceedingly abundantly above all you could ask or think? Do you believe He wants to overwhelm you with His goodness and blessing? The Bible says that if we have faith the size of a tiny mustard seed, we can move mountains. And no matter how much faith we have, faith can grow in us by hearing, studying, and receiving the Word of God. I encourage you today, make God's Word a priority. Believe that He will do exceedingly abundantly above all you can ask or think. He is faithful to His Word, and He will be faithful to fulfill every promise He's made to you! A PRAYER FOR TODAY "Heavenly Father, thank You for Your goodness in my life. Thank You for blessing me and for doing exceedingly abundantly above all I can ask or think. Thank You for increasing my faith as I focus on Your Word. In Jesus' Name. Amen." The Lord continues DAILY to go beyond all I have imagined ... NO eye has seen, nor ear heard ... PRAISE THE LORD!!!! ... tonight heading downtown to hear Rob Bell:) GLORY.... GRACE AND PEACE!

journey

Again so timely .... From God Calling

Fret not your souls with puzzles that you cannot solve. The solution may never be shown you until you have left this flesh-life. Remember what I have so often told you , "I have yet many things to say unto you, but ye cannot bear them now." Only step by step, and stage by stage, can you proceed, in your journey upward. The one thing to be sure of is that it is a journey with ME. There does come a Joy known to those how suffer with ME. But that is not the result of the suffering, but the result of the close intimacy with ME, to which suffering drove you.

How often I find myself trying to solve - find the answers ... when what I am called to do is draw near to HIM. I need to continue to develop intimacy with HIM. Oh how I draw HIM near ... he is always there. Revealing what I need in the right time. gives me chills.

Last night was the first custom bead party ... AWESOME! It was thrilling. One of the coolest things was when a dear friend that I have not seen in many months said " Beth, you look like YOU" that was amazing, I was in my groove talking about creative ideas for jewelry and helping make decisions ... it was intoxicating.

When I finish this entry, I am hitting the beads. I am looking forward to creating the items ordered last night. The next event is Monday 12/7th followed by a 3rd on Wednesday 12/9 .... on a ROLL! The creative juices are flowing - PRAISE THE LORD!

Continue to draw near to HIM .... this is a journey - perfectly planned and ordered.

GRACE AND PEACE!

Rob Bell - Drops Like Stars Tour

Rob Bell (from Mars Hill Bible Church in Grand Rapids, MI) will be in Indy December 11th for the Drops Likes Stars tour ...

description:

We plot, we plan, we assume things are going to go A certain way and then they don’t and we find ourselves
In a new place, a place we haven’t been before, a place
We never would have imagined on our own,

And so it was difficult and unexpected and maybe even
Tragic and yet it opened us up and freed us to see
Things in a whole new way

Suffering does that—
It hurts,
But it also creates.

How many of the most significant moments in your
Life came not because it all went right, but because
It all fell apart?

It’s strange how there can be art in the agony…

The Drops Like Stars tour is a two
Hour exploration of the endlessly complex
Relationship between suffering and creativity—
And I’d love to see you there.



Doors 7pm
Event 8pm

Tickets:
http://robbell.com/dropslikestars

GRACE AND PEACE

Just real.

So for the past few days I have been in the dumps. Feeling blah. My mind is focused on Jeremy. I keep thinking about the holiday season and nearing his birthday - I am missing him terrible. I am consumed with thoughts of memories that we do not have. I find myself in the middle of anything crying. It really stinks. While, I am pretty sure this is part of the grieving process, it is a part I am not too fond of.

in my journal I wrote today:

Lord, be with me. Your Spirit makes me strong. Lord in your strength this time will glorify you. My mind is feeling weak, my heart is aching for Jeremy. Thank you Lord that you are close, that you know my sadness. Praise you Lord that I can lean on you - trusting and stepping in faith, following your Love, Grace and Mercy.

Then I read todays God Calling, this is a portion:

I am beside you.

A very human Jesus, who understands all your weaknesses, and sees too your struggles and conquests.

So fainting and need, by the lakeside of life, know that I will supply your need, not grudgingly, but in full measure.

The Lord is so quick to answer - and I am always surprised.

Lord, I love you and praise you for your support in my utter and complete weakness. Thank you that I can lean on you and your strength sustains me.

BUT IT DOES NOT STOP THERE ... I went on the read Psalm 31 ... the parts that spoke to me this morning:

1 In you O Lord, I have taken refuge; let me never be put to shame: deliver me in your righteousness.

4 Free me from the trap that is set for me, for you are my refuge.

5 Into your hands I commit my spirit; redeem me. O Lord, the God of truth.

7 I will be glad and rejoice in your love, for you saw my affliction and knew the anguish of my soul.

9 Be merciful to me, O Lord, for I am in distress; my eyes grow weak with sorrow, my soul and my body with grief.

14 But I trust in you O LORD; I say "YOU ARE MY GOD"

15My times are in your hands.

21 Praise be to the Lord, for he showed his wonderful love to me.

23 Love the Lord, all his saints! The Lord preserves the faithful, but the proud he pays back in full.

24 Be strong and take heart, ALL you who hope in the Lord.

I am so filled by the Spirit - and I was then reminded of one of the 5.6 class memory verses ... John 16:24 Until now your have not asked for anything in my name. Ask and you will receive, and your joy will be complete.

I need to allow my grief to get out of me - I have continued to suppress my emotions and feelings. Moving along like all is well, things are fine when actually that is not the case at all -- these feelings and emotions needed to get out! And wow, the peace that fills me now - thank you Jesus!

There are some hard days ahead, I simply Pray for the Lord to continue to carry me.

GRACE AND PEACE!