understanding

One day a rabbi stood on a hill overlooking a certain city. The rabbi watched in horror as a band of Cossacks on horseback suddenly attacked the town, killing innocent men, women and children. Some of the slaughtered were his own disciples. Looking up to heaven the rabbi exclaimed "Oh, if only I were God." An astonished student, standing nearby, asked, "But, Master, if you were God, what would you do differently?" The rabbi replied: "If I were God I would do nothing differently. If I were God I would understand."

This was part of my devotion last week, and I have been thinking about it since.

Specifically, I had a visit with my Special Nurse, which included talking to a mother that recently suffered a stillbirth. It breaks my heart that there is one more family that has suffered loss, while I know she will find fantastic support with my Special Nurse, who I am so thankful for - I hate that there is even a need for her position. My heart aches for this young couple simply hoping to start a family.

I have been thinking, how I often would like to just understand.

Then I realize, I appreciate, that I am working with just enough light for the step in front of me walking in trust, that God, the one who does know and understand has a plan for me, and each of us.


"For I know the plans I have for you." Declares the Lord,"plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future..." Jeremiah 29:11

GRACE AND PEACE

three months!

Xavier & I had a "photo shoot" in my sisters backyard ... here are 2 of the 300 i took!

with sophie ....

remembering his brother Jeremy ...

Xavier, 3 months 15 lbs | 24 1/2"

GRACE AND PEACE!

just sayin'

most mornings, weather permitting - Xavier and I take a walk. We have discovered that we can walk 5 miles through 7 connected neighborhoods with no back tracking and stating off busy roads. LOVE IT!

As I push him, i am amazed that God chose to bless us in this manner, how when i looked back over my journals for the past 2 1/2 years HE heard my prayer, my cry, my plea and answered me in the most unexpected and amazing manner. My heart cry ... "to bring a baby home from the hospital" ... LOOK AT GOD! He did it, in only a manner that HE receives all the GLORY. PRAISE BE TO GOD!!!

I am so surprised by the rush of emotions that over come me with the realization that HE heard me - HE heard my cries and HE answered.

the word from JOEL reminded me of this

Holding Fast

TODAY’S SCRIPTURE“Let us hold fast the profession of our faith without wavering; (for He is faithful that promised)” (Hebrews 10:23, KJV)

TODAY’S WORD from Joel and Victoria“Hold fast” is not a phrase we often use in this culture. But in the original Greek, hold fast means not only to embrace, but to embrace with force as if someone is trying to take something from you. In other words, you’ve got to have a firm grip or you’re going to lose out! And notice what we are supposed to hold fast to — our profession, our declaration of faith.

I like to think of it sort of like a tug of war. You’re on one end and the enemy is on the other. He’s trying to pull that rope out of your hand. He’s trying to steal your hope and get you to speak negative words of doubt and unbelief. But you’ve got to be determined and stand strong. You’ve got to persevere and hold fast. Don’t let the enemy pull the seed of faith out of your heart! You might need to dig your heals in and get a new grip, but don’t you dare let go! Keep speaking words of faith. Keep speaking words of hope. Keep declaring God's Word and keep holding fast to the profession of your faith!

A PRAYER FOR TODAY Father in heaven, today I choose to hold fast to my profession of faith in You. I know that You are faithful, and I believe that You will complete everything that You’ve started in my life. I bless You and magnify You above all else. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

I continue to lean into Jesus ... I am fairly certain Xavier is just the start of big blessings to come!

GRACE AND PEACE!!

2 mo & growing!

so blessed with a growing, interactive little guy!

tummy time
really enjoying tummy time!

GRACE AND PEACE!

continued awe

i love being a mom.
i really love changing dirty (sometimes really dirty) diapers, late night / early morning feedings, the HUGE smile when my son hears my voice, followed by the coo when he sees me.
i love watching him sleep.
i love watching his dad play with him.
i love thanking God for choosing me to be Xaviers mom ... and for choosing Xavier to be my son.

i love that God is not done, i am in a great place.
a place full of joy ... today i was reminded that God has more ... i do NOT want to get in HIS way ...

Get Ready for More
TODAY’S SCRIPTURE“Enlarge the place of your tent, stretch your tent curtains wide, do not hold back...”(Isaiah 54:2, NIV)
TODAY’S WORD from Joel and Victoria God has greater blessings in store for you! He has favor in your future like you’ve never imagined. He wants to take you places that you’ve never dreamed. But in order for us to partake of all these blessings, we have to increase our capacity to receive.Think about this: if you have a one-gallon bucket, and someone has fifty gallons to give you, the problem is not with the supply. The problem is that you don’t have the capacity to receive the fifty gallons. But if you get rid of that small container and get something larger, then you will be able to receive more. It’s the same way with God. If we think we’ve reached our limits, the problem isn’t that God doesn’t have the resources or the ability. The problem is that our container is too small. We have to enlarge our vision and make room for the new things God has for us. Our attitude should be, “Even though the economy is down, I know God is still on the throne. I know wherever I go His goodness and mercy follow me.” When you have that kind of attitude, you’re increasing your capacity to receive so that you can live the abundant life He has in store for you.
A PRAYER FOR TODAY Father in heaven, today I choose to increase my capacity to receive from You. I let go of limited thinking and old mindsets and open myself to everything You have in store for me. In Jesus’ Name. Amen

GRACE AND PEACE

Sacred Parenting

"For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me" Matthew 25:35-36

our life group started a new study, Sacred Parenting (Gary Thomas) ... how raising children shapes our souls. Not only has our group started this study - I am leading it! ... jumping right in.

this weekend will be the 2nd session ... during my preview I was rocked - by the above well known verse.

In my limited view, I read this verse with eyes that understood it to state I needed to reach out to those less fortunate then me, more specific the people on the side of the road, the folks with out homes and without resources. NEVER had I looked at this statement through the lens of a parent (an adoptive parent at that). Granted this parent lens is a new for me ... but with this lens, I am able to see the manifestation of this scripture. As a parent the first thing you do is meet this little stranger, feed him, clothe him, bring him home, care for him. Care for his EVERY NEED. Without question.

Further, I began to think about my life as a whole, expanding my view of who I may have helped clothe, feed, care for - before becoming a parent ... suddenly my years of teaching and coaching came flooding back.

How different that scripture looks through a new lens - how narrow my view has been ...

I can only imagine as this study unfolds and I continue to learn how to be a GOD Centered person, My prayer , that my lens will be altered and my heart more like HIS.

GRACE AND PEACE!

Our Family

Enjoying Easter:)

Family Picture Easter Sunday

GRACE AND PEACE!